Our theme this month is hope. In preparation for this post, I listened to Joy Lab podcast Episode 148
Margaret Mitchell, the author of Gone with the Wind, said “Every problem has two handles. You can grab it by the handle of fear or the handle of hope.”
You may have heard the story, perhaps coming from the Cherokee people: there once was a grandfather who said to his grandson “there is a war going on inside me between a black wolf and a white wolf. The black wolf is anger, sorrow, and greed. The white wolf is hope, love, and peace. You have the same battle going on inside you, as every person does.”
“Which one will win?” asked the boy.
“The one you feed,” replied the grandfather.
Psychologist Henry Emmons uses this story to talk about brain anatomy. He explains that the prefrontal cortex has two halves. In the left prefrontal cortex, we are more positive, open, compassionate. In the right, we are fearful, negative, self-protective.
We need both halves. One half keeps us exploring, reaching out, and feeling empathy. The other helps us sense danger and take protective action.
Psychologist Nicole Poell has written a wonderful version of the story.
Emmons discusses the results of brain scans done on Buddhist monks. Shown a picture of a child with a deformity, their left prefrontal cortex lit up with compassion. That was not true of non-meditators. After a few weeks of training in compassionate meditation, however, their brains also showed activation in that area. This is evidence of what scientists call neuroplasticity. Our minds can be trained to respond differently and even change structure.
We can’t control or influence the past, our genetics, or our early childhood experiences.
We can control our mental and physical habits.
“The moment you change your perception is the moment you rewrite the chemistry of your body.” – Dr. James Lipton
Hope is knowing that things will inevitably change. We forget that our minds aren’t seeing the truth. We don’t have to play negative thought whack-a-mole. When we are beset by negative thoughts and emotions, we just need to realize it. We need to feed the white wolf.
People who are hopeful are more likely to
- achieve their goals
- maintain healthy habits (exercise, nutrition, sleep)
- recover from illness more quickly
- experience more life satisfaction
- Have a stronger sense of meaning and purpose
Hope is a better predictor of well-being than optimism or self-efficacy.
Noticing negative thoughts and emotions and practicing hope creates an upward spiral.
“Half of any person is wrong and weak and off the path. The other half is dancing and swimming and flying in the invisible joy.” – Rumi
in your journal:
- describe a time you were aware of inner conflict.
- how might you “feed the white wolf?”
- Write your own fable.