Kind promise: I will ask for and accept help gracefully.
About a week ago, someone offered me eight photographic cards. I was about to decline politely when I paused… Wasn’t I about to reject an offer of help? This, in a month when I am practicing accepting help gracefully? I accepted the cards, thanking the friend who offered them. I decided to say “yes” every time someone offers something to me.
Since then (just a week, mind you) I have received a ride, a massage and several batches of help around the house.
Asking for help is still hard for me, even though, as a person with significant disability, I do it many times each day. My instinct to refuse help teaches me that accepting help is still a challenge as well.
What I’m talking about is vulnerability. A quick Google search will plunge me into Brené Brown territory, a land I have visited happily and often over the last five years since her 2010 TED talk made me a fan.
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”
― Brené Brown, Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead
As with all my kind promises, vulnerability may not ever become easy or instinctive. It is, however, clearly worth the effort. The promises are PRACTICES. As with all practice, I will make mistakes. (My current mistake is thinking I should be “better at vulnerability by now.”)
The trick is to forgive with wild abandon and to release, recommit and return to practice.
Kind promise: I will ask for and accept help gracefully.