Kind promise: I will reinvent whimsically.

PaintingThere’s a saying amongst teachers: “You teach what you most need to learn.” Recently (in the e-book Comfort & Joy) I wrote: “Your job right now is to take one incredibly small, ridiculously tiny step toward the light. We are talking about a step so small that it almost hurts not to do it.”

I write what I most need to learn.

At the beginning of this month, I made a list of the things that bug me. I brainstormed ideas for how I could make things better and implemented a few of them. Things have improved, though not in the spectacularly sweeping ways. I imagined three weeks ago.  Instead, holding the idea of change in my mind, I have taken incredibly small, ridiculously tiny steps to a better life.

I have my shorthand list and check it each week. Has anything changed? As I glance down the list, I see notes: “a little progress…” “Something is brewing…” Change is happening slowly, like the unfolding of a leaf.

We often try to regulate change. We like big goals, action steps, accountability dates. That works sometimes for some people. It doesn’t often work for me. I tense around goals and too easily beat myself up when I miss deadlines.

This method that is evolving in my life – of holding the vision and creeping up on it gently, with tiny soft, foot falls – is working. It’s an alternative to the hard charging, accomplishment-driven way forward of my past.